Well I've officially spent two weeks in Uganda and so much has happened I don't even know where to begin. So let's just start with the top ten amusing themes that have characterized my experience thus far:
1. So much for losing weight on the Africa diet! I am eating an absurd amount of food here, and I'm estimating that approximately 96% of it consists of pure carbs. Good thing I walk everywhere because I'm pretty sure that otherwise I wouldn't be able to digest the 10 zillion pounds of matooke I consume on a daily basis.
2. Speaking of matooke, I'm getting used to it. I even actually like it when it's drenched in the ground nut and entula sauce that we have a lot of the time, so that is a positive development. Also I'm almost getting used to eating dinner at close to 10 at night with my family (even though I'm still half-asleep as I shovel down my matooke). What I'm not quite used to yet is the paw-paw we have for dessert most days of the week, which it very clearly a fruit but to me tastes like something halfway between a very strong cheese and a load of garbage. And yet I still attempt to eat it out of politeness to my family, at least most days...
3. Speaking of my family, my new best friends at home are under the age of ten. I'm gradually connecting with my host family but because the other adults at the house pretty much do their own thing most of the time (either conversing with eachother in Luganda or doing housework which they will not let me help out with), it's kind of awkward to just linger around them so instead I hang out with my host mother's niece's two little girls, Faith who is 3 and Gloria who is 9. They absolutely love to color with my art supplies, teach me Luganda words, play with my camera and cell phone, and just dance around and be silly with me. They are my constant companions and are super adorable! Faith actually walked here with me to the office so I could make this post so she says hello. At least I think she would if she spoke English.
4. Puppies here are not pets. :( I wish you could hear the sound of my heart breaking. There are tons of dogs all over the place and they are so cute and I just want to go cuddle with them but alas they are wild animals. Wild animals with rabies. Because of this, all of us in my program got the rabies vaccine, which is probably a good thing for me because one of these days I swear I'm going to stop thinking and go pet a cute little puppy that turns out to be a rabid beast that will try to eat my hand off.
5. My skin is finally reacting to the climate change, and not in a good way. I am breaking out like nobody's business, and the other day my host mother asked me why I was getting so many mosquito bites on my face! Ouch.
6. I thoroughly embarrass myself on pretty much a five minute basis. If I make it longer than fifteen or twenty minutes without butchering the language, doing something culturally inappropriate, or simply acting a fool, I consider this a grand accomplishment!
7. My encounters with the male population (well not the men I actually know but random men on the street) consist mainly of turning down marriage proposals and/or stating very emphatically that no, I really, really can't get you a green card. This happens numerous times a day, and I have gotten very used to telling people I have a husband back in America.
8. To my pleasant surprise, bucket showers are very enjoyable. It's a nice little ritual every night to crouch down with the bucket and rinse away the layer of red dirt that accumulates on my skin over the course of the day.
9. Television is hilarious here. My family watches television every evening and thus I watch it with them. The UTV (one of I think two channels we have) lineup is American music videos (both of the current and late '90s variety) and the evening news, followed by a fabulous daily rotation of programs that include the British version of Deal or No Deal (very low budget and dreadfully unexciting yet somehow really funny), second-string American crime drama shows like Criminal Minds, and – my personal favorites – a pair of telenovelas, Second Chance and Two Sides of Ana. Second Chance is the best. It is so, so bad that it's reached the point of being absolutely hilarious and almost addictive. It is still so comical to me that I am in Uganda watching Mexican soap operas dubbed over in English. Seriously, life is too funny.
10. When I am not working, eating, coloring, exploring, or watching TV, I am most likely dancing (and concurrently being laughed at by whoever I'm dancing with). The Ugandan music on the radio is pretty awesome. Unfortunately I have no idea what any of the songs are called or who sings them, but they sure are great to dance to. Oh, also on TV there is a Ugandan show called Hotsteppers that's like a low-budget American idol for hip hop dancers. Needless to say, I LOVE watching it, especially because me and the two little girls dance along and try to imitate the dancers. And the live finale is in Kampala today – it only costs 5000 shillings to get in (like $2.40) but I can't go. Boo.
Well, I hope that gives you a general picture of what I do here. Hopefully I can soon give more substantial and coherent insight into what I'll be working on (but I honestly don't know yet) and what life here is actually like (but I honestly can't put it into words). Honestly I can't describe what I'm experiencing, and as the queen of overly wordy explanations for things, that rarely happens to me. So be patient as I try to find words for the crazy conglomeration of sights, smells, tastes, people, places, animals, ideas, thoughts, feelings, and contradictions that is Uganda.
So much love from Jinja and if you have any particular questions about what I'm up to, shoot them my way! Tunalabagana edda! (See you later!)
-- Heidi – Oh, except my name is no longer Heidi. I now go by any combination of the following three names: Irene, muzungu, and Kitimbo (which I was officially named by the village I visited last weekend... I have no idea what it means but oh well). Oh and one of the guys I work with calls me Tempatt (some variation of my last name I suppose).
Saturday, January 31, 2009
Thursday, January 15, 2009
Taking my freedom, pulling it off the shelf, putting it on my chain...
So I leave for the airport in like three hours and I just finished packing (phewf!) but now of course I can't sleep...
Actually, I probably could sleep if I tried, but I'm afraid of the nightmares from the malaria pills (no joke). You see, I put off taking the malaria pills this week because I was afraid of the nightmares which are a side effect of the pills, then I realized that I need to take the pills because otherwise I'll get malaria, and then after I took the pills tonight I realized I'm really screwed because I took them too late and now I'll probably get nightmares AND malaria. Oh joy!
But the other reason I can't sleep is that I don't know what to think or feel at this point. I am past excitement and am now totally and utterly blank with awe. I really don't even think it hit me that I was leaving until this afternoon when I was driving around town, running last-minute errands (because I am an idiot and never learn any better and do absolutely everything last minute every time...), getting Route 44 slushies during happy hour at sonic... yep I actually think it was the lemonberry slush that finally did it for me. I'm sipping my slush and then I think, "Damn this is the last slush I'll be having in a looooooong time..." and that's what set off this strange feeling of finality that's been hanging over me ever since.
Today made me realize I have a lot of attachments. I don't know if you've heard of the whole nonattachment thing that's in Buddhist philosophy, but it's pretty self-explanatory (don't be attached to anything) and I am in love with the concept. I am also absolutely terrible at it. Just when I think I'm all ready to live all rough and greasy in Uganda, I get really, really, really attached to the comforting, familiar staples of Our Modern American World. Staples like slushies. Ice cream. Cheesy gordita crunches with-no-beef-beans-instead. McDonald's. MSNBC. Late night reruns on TNT. Hot showers. Doritos. Laundry machines. Heating and air conditioning. Toilet paper. Water that you don't have to boil and/or treat with iodine before you drink it.
But this is what I love about the situation I've thrust myself into: I will be forced to unattach myself from all these fluffy empty "comfort foods" and open up wide spaces for greater, fuller, much much more exciting and real things to unfold. I don't have to work at it, I don't have to try, I just have to go with it, trust in the good, let go and let it all happen. Really, that's all we ever need to do. It's so darn simple! Why do we (and by we I mean I) always manage to make it all so darn complicated?
Simplicity is something I've been after for a loooong time. I think part of the curse of being an artist and being in love with the world is that to me everything is precious, everything is a treasure, and I end up snatching up and holding on to every little glimpse of magic I catch out of the corner of my eye while walking down the street from one moment to the next and over time what was once simple and magical in that one moment evolves into a heaping pile of clutter. Because the magic was never supposed to be held onto in the first place. And yet it's so hard to let go and realize that in the end nothing is precious, nothing is a treasure. You don't need to hold on; you don't ever need to do, have, or be anything. And while I can think that and believe that, I have never been able to live that. I still want my slushie, please.
Nonattachment. It's a bitch.
So here's to letting go. Letting go of the knots in my stomach, the expectations in my head, the money in my pocket, the books in my bag. Something truly truly magical is about to unfold. I don't know what will happen. But I'm already in love with it.
Much much love and please let yourself have a day of freedom. Give yourself permission. Go on, live you life like it's golden!! (Oh, Jill Scott's "Golden" is my anthem for the next 48 hours).
And stay tuned for the first pictures/musings from UGANDA!!!! OH MY GOSH!!
Actually, I probably could sleep if I tried, but I'm afraid of the nightmares from the malaria pills (no joke). You see, I put off taking the malaria pills this week because I was afraid of the nightmares which are a side effect of the pills, then I realized that I need to take the pills because otherwise I'll get malaria, and then after I took the pills tonight I realized I'm really screwed because I took them too late and now I'll probably get nightmares AND malaria. Oh joy!
But the other reason I can't sleep is that I don't know what to think or feel at this point. I am past excitement and am now totally and utterly blank with awe. I really don't even think it hit me that I was leaving until this afternoon when I was driving around town, running last-minute errands (because I am an idiot and never learn any better and do absolutely everything last minute every time...), getting Route 44 slushies during happy hour at sonic... yep I actually think it was the lemonberry slush that finally did it for me. I'm sipping my slush and then I think, "Damn this is the last slush I'll be having in a looooooong time..." and that's what set off this strange feeling of finality that's been hanging over me ever since.
Today made me realize I have a lot of attachments. I don't know if you've heard of the whole nonattachment thing that's in Buddhist philosophy, but it's pretty self-explanatory (don't be attached to anything) and I am in love with the concept. I am also absolutely terrible at it. Just when I think I'm all ready to live all rough and greasy in Uganda, I get really, really, really attached to the comforting, familiar staples of Our Modern American World. Staples like slushies. Ice cream. Cheesy gordita crunches with-no-beef-beans-instead. McDonald's. MSNBC. Late night reruns on TNT. Hot showers. Doritos. Laundry machines. Heating and air conditioning. Toilet paper. Water that you don't have to boil and/or treat with iodine before you drink it.
But this is what I love about the situation I've thrust myself into: I will be forced to unattach myself from all these fluffy empty "comfort foods" and open up wide spaces for greater, fuller, much much more exciting and real things to unfold. I don't have to work at it, I don't have to try, I just have to go with it, trust in the good, let go and let it all happen. Really, that's all we ever need to do. It's so darn simple! Why do we (and by we I mean I) always manage to make it all so darn complicated?
Simplicity is something I've been after for a loooong time. I think part of the curse of being an artist and being in love with the world is that to me everything is precious, everything is a treasure, and I end up snatching up and holding on to every little glimpse of magic I catch out of the corner of my eye while walking down the street from one moment to the next and over time what was once simple and magical in that one moment evolves into a heaping pile of clutter. Because the magic was never supposed to be held onto in the first place. And yet it's so hard to let go and realize that in the end nothing is precious, nothing is a treasure. You don't need to hold on; you don't ever need to do, have, or be anything. And while I can think that and believe that, I have never been able to live that. I still want my slushie, please.
Nonattachment. It's a bitch.
So here's to letting go. Letting go of the knots in my stomach, the expectations in my head, the money in my pocket, the books in my bag. Something truly truly magical is about to unfold. I don't know what will happen. But I'm already in love with it.
Much much love and please let yourself have a day of freedom. Give yourself permission. Go on, live you life like it's golden!! (Oh, Jill Scott's "Golden" is my anthem for the next 48 hours).
And stay tuned for the first pictures/musings from UGANDA!!!! OH MY GOSH!!
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